Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Help me help you realize you are a moron
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
