Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize
