So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
