6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
just found out that she named her cat after me.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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