Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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