Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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