what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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