Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize