Small penises have feelings too.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize