Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
