I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
