This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
