She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
