You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize