I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
3 2 1 whiskey
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
