you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Randomize
