Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize