just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
My bed smells like the plague
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
