Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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