well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize