He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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