There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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