The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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