she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
