who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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