dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize