we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize