what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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