# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
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Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
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Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
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