I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
