Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
