Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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