we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
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Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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