I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
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The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I forget how to act sober
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