Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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