I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
