I'm drive I can fine osifer
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Randomize
