i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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