I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize