I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
