this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
