I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
