Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
