But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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