Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
