Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
