i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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