you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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