where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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