Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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